Pain

Raven Ambrose
Jul 30
12 min read

Updated: 3 days ago

Do You Feel the Burn?

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At some point, we've all dealt with physical pain. It's something everyone goes through, and it can show up in different ways, from a little annoyance to really intense agony. Pain can be short-term, like after you get hurt or have surgery, or it can stick around for a long time, like with arthritis or fibromyalgia.

Pain is a complicated thing involving both your body and brain, acting as an important alert that something's not right. It might come from outside factors, like accidents or sports injuries, where you get hurt. For example, twisting your ankle or breaking a bone can cause sharp pain, making you head to the doctor. On the flip side, pain can also come from inside your body, like infections or diseases such as cancer, which might not have an obvious cause but can be just as tough to deal with.

Plus, how we feel pain is super personal and can be really different from one person to the next. Things like genetics, your mental state, and past experiences with pain can all affect how you feel and handle it. Some people have a high pain threshold and can push through a lot, while others might find even small aches pretty overwhelming.

Besides just the physical stuff, pain can really mess with your emotions and mental state. Chronic pain, especially, can make you feel frustrated, helpless, and even depressed because it limits what you can do every day. This emotional strain can create a vicious cycle where pain makes mental health issues worse, and those issues, in turn, can make the pain feel even more intense. That's why it's super important for people dealing with this to get treatment that tackles both the physical and emotional sides of their condition.

On top of that, how society views pain and its management can really impact someone's experience. Cultural beliefs about showing pain can make some folks play down what they're going through, while others might feel more encouraged to seek help and speak up for themselves. This just shows how important it is to talk openly about managing pain and to provide caring support that understands how complex pain can be.

In the end, dealing with physical pain is something we all go through at some point. It acts like a warning system for our bodies, pushing us to do something and get better. Grasping the ins and outs of pain, like what causes it, how it affects us, and the different ways people experience it, is key to building empathy and coming up with effective ways to treat it, both in healthcare and in our personal lives.

In my 39 years, I've been through quite a bit, both physically and emotionally. Raising four kids, including twins, has been a wild ride filled with laughter and chaos. Motherhood has been amazing, but it's also tested my physical limits. One of my biggest challenges has been my health, especially my spine. I've had two surgeries for herniated discs between C5 and C6, and C6 and C7. If you've ever dealt with nerve pain, you know it's no joke—way worse than labor contractions. It's relentless and hard to ignore.

I've tried all sorts of pain meds, even the heavy-duty ones, but nothing's really done the trick. Gabapentin helps a bit, but the relief is short-lived and doesn't fully bring back my quality of life. Besides the nerve pain, I'm stuck with chronic neck pain, thanks to the surgeries. I've lost feeling in one and a half fingers on my left hand, which makes everyday tasks frustrating.

My health issues don't stop there. I busted my right ankle in five places, which still gives me grief and affects how I get around. Plus, I have right hip dysplasia, causing constant pain that can be pretty intense. It radiates through my hip and leg, making it tough to do things I used to love. On top of that, I've got high arches in my feet, making walking a challenge and leaving me feeling off-balance and tired.

In my search for relief, I found The Good Feet Store, and they've been a lifesaver. Their arch supports and orthotic solutions have changed how I walk and move. I never knew walking could feel this good, and it's been a game-changer for my posture and balance. Even in tough times, there are moments of relief and hope, and I'm always looking for ways to improve my health and well-being.

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When I Broke My Ankle

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A couple of autumns back, right at the end of September, I was biking every single day. I had this goal to cover a certain distance on my bike, and it was my top priority. To make things more comfortable, I got a wider seat because those standard bike seats are ridiculously small—they can't even hold one whole butt cheek.

I was doing great with my cycling until two rainy days threw me off track. As soon as the rain let up, I hopped back on my bike. I was pumped to ride again after being stuck inside. Wanting to make up for lost time, I aimed to ride farther than ever before. I was doing well until I hit my planned midpoint, but everything came to a halt about halfway back.

I had this water bottle with a handle attached to my bike's handlebars. Even though I was super thirsty, I was too lazy to fully take the bottle off or stop for a drink. This little bit of laziness cost me. It probably would've been quicker to just detach the whole bottle instead of wrestling with unscrewing it from the lid (still hanging on the handlebars) and then screwing it back on while pedaling.

Remember the rain I mentioned? So, there was this puddle, and while I was dealing with it, things went downhill fast. Next thing I know, I'm on the ground, my water bottle's a few feet away, and my ankle's looking all twisted. I remember thinking, "That's not right." Then I screamed, but it was short 'cause I needed to figure out what to do. Luckily, I had my fanny pack with my phone, so I called my husband. I wasn't screaming, but I was definitely scared and crying. I tried to explain what happened, but he kept asking where I was. Seriously, I had no idea—just lying there with a busted ankle. Isn't that why we have Life360? He was just getting to my daughter's friend's house to pick her up when this all went down. Her friend's dad had just come home, and when my husband explained, he said, "Oh, I must've driven past her." They kindly offered to watch her.

As I lay there, I wondered if anyone would stop to help. So many cars just drove by, and it was really frustrating. Eventually, a guy on a bike showed up. Lucky for me, he was a paramedic. I think he called 911, but I'm not totally sure. Then a woman came over, knelt down, and helped support me to keep me steady. My back was killing me from trying to hold that position, and she stayed right there behind me the whole time.

Finally, my husband showed up. The lady asked if I wanted her to switch spots, and I was like, "Oh hell no, don't move me." So she stayed put. She told me she used to be a nurse, and I felt super lucky right then. A police officer came over too. She wasn't called to the scene; she was just passing by and decided to help. She called for an ambulance right away. Unfortunately, they said it would take 30 minutes because the local ones were busy and one had to come from farther away. 30 MINUTES!!! It felt like the longest 30 minutes ever. The woman behind me never left my side the whole time. When the ambulance finally arrived, she stayed with me until I was inside. I only got a quick look at my angel that day, but I truly appreciated it.

I don't remember much about the ambulance ride. What I do remember is being in the ER. I'm lying there, my foot twisted to the left with a little piece of bone sticking out. A young doctor comes in. He’s probably still a resident, or at least I hope so after what he did. He tells me he's going to set my foot. They had just given me fentanyl (which doesn’t really work for me; I guess I smoke too much weed for it to be effective). I'm still in a ton of pain.

So, this guy adjusted my foot, and my husband said I screamed so loud that people came over to check what was up. The problem? This genius didn't even make sure my pain meds were working before messing with my foot. Basic nursing 101, right? Oh, but he was a doctor. After he set it, he just walked off without stabilizing it. Later, another doctor came by, and thankfully, this one knew what he was doing.

He moved me to a trauma room in the ER and put me in a twilight state. I don't remember much after that, but he was setting and stabilizing my ankle properly.

The next day at home, the pain got worse. I try to stick to ibuprofen unless the pain is unbearable. I'll explain why in another blog. Turns out, I was developing compartment syndrome, so back to the ER I went. Just so you know, ER visits aren't cheap, and we pay every single time. So, grrrrr.

They let go of the stabilizer, and I'm off.

The next three months were pretty tough, throwing challenges my way that really tested how resilient and adaptable I was. During this period, I couldn't walk, drive, or do a lot of things I used to take for granted. Tasks that used to be second nature suddenly felt like huge obstacles. I had to lean on others for help, which was a big change for me. I'd always been the one taking care of my family and friends, so needing to ask for and accept help was a major shift. This reliance wasn't just physically tough; it was emotionally draining too. I'd never felt so vulnerable and helpless for such an extended time. Sure, there were times before, like after having kids or my neck surgery, when I needed support. But even then, I could do more than I managed during these three months. I could still tackle some daily tasks, even if they were hard, and I had a sense of control that I lost during this time. Those three months seemed to stretch on forever, each day blending into the next as I dealt with this new normal. I struggled with feelings of frustration and sadness as I watched my independence slip away. Activities I once loved, like taking long walks in the park, driving to see friends, or just moving around my house easily, felt replaced by a sense of being stuck. I had to get used to a slower pace, relying a lot on the kindness and generosity of those around me. Friends and family pitched in with errands, chores, and even just keeping me company, which was a blessing but also a constant reminder of my limitations. As weeks went by, I started thinking about how important community and support systems are. I came to appreciate the relationships I’d built over the years, realizing that accepting help didn’t make me weak; it highlighted how connected we all are. This period of needing others turned into a time of deep reflection, where I faced my feelings of inadequacy and learned to welcome others' kindness. I discovered that even if I couldn't play my usual role, I could still contribute in different ways, like sharing my experiences and offering emotional support to those who visited. In short, those three challenging months were a profound journey of learning, growth, and adaptation. They pushed me to rethink what strength and vulnerability mean, teaching me that in our toughest times, we find out how deep our relationships go and how strong our spirit really is.

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Earthly Angel

So, on a different note, I finally got to meet my angel in person. That's one of the coolest things about social media. I put up a post on Facebook about myself and who I was trying to find. Honestly, I didn't think it would work, so I kind of forgot about it. But then, a few months later, I got a Facebook message that needed my approval. It was her!!

When I found out where she was, I cried a lot. I invited her out for coffee, and my youngest daughter and I met her at this cute bakery nearby.

She’s truly an amazing woman, and I’m super thankful for her. I ended up buying her coffee; it was the least I could do. We haven’t had the chance to meet up again because life gets busy, but we do chat on messenger sometimes. I’m just so grateful I got to meet my lifesaver that day.

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Post Op

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I'm chilling on my front porch, my little escape from the craziness of everyday life, trying to stay healthy and find some comfort. The air's fresh, with that late-summer vibe, but I'm still reaching for a joint. Smoking's become a bit of a habit for me since it usually helps with stress and discomfort. Not sure if it'll work this time though; dealing with unpredictable pain is something I'm used to, but it still bugs me.

Sitting here, I'm thinking about my situation. My ankle pain's pretty stable right now, which is a nice break, though I know it might not last. Just today, I had surgery to get rid of some metal bits left over from a break I had a few years back. That injury was rough, and those fragments were a constant reminder of the pain and long recovery journey. Every day was a struggle, full of physical therapy and a rollercoaster of emotions from hope to despair.

When it comes to managing pain, I'm picky about what meds I take. I stick to over-the-counter stuff like Tylenol and ibuprofen only when I really need it because I want to avoid the side effects of stronger prescriptions. I've learned to listen to my body, knowing when the pain's too much and when I can tough it out. Right now, the pain's manageable; there's a dull throb in my ankle, but it's not too bad.

Even though things are pretty calm right now, I'm dealing with another pesky issue: nausea. It's like this annoying shadow that just won't go away, reminding me of how tough the surgery and meds can be on my body. I wish handling the nausea was as easy as managing the pain because it's really messing with my ability to enjoy the simple joys of hanging out on my porch. The breeze rustling the leaves doesn't do much for my queasy stomach, but I try to focus on the good stuff—the sun warming my skin, birds chirping in the distance, and knowing that I'm on the road to recovery.

As I sit here, I think about everything that led me to this porch and this moment of peace. I remind myself that healing isn't just about the body; it's about the mind and spirit too. I take a deep breath, letting the fresh air fill my lungs, hoping that with each breath out, I can let go of some of the tension inside me. I know the path ahead might still be tough, but I'm determined to tackle it with patience and strength, taking it one day at a time.

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Lists

Books 📚

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Songs 🎶

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Movies//Shows/Documentaries 🎦

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Bible verses about pain ✝️

Isaiah 53:5 – “But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed.”
2 Corinthians 12:9 – “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”
Job 30:17 – “Night pierces my bones; my gnawing pains never rest.”
Psalm 38:7 – “My back is filled with searing pain; there is no health in my body.”
Matthew 8:17 – “This was to fulfill what was spoken through the prophet Isaiah: ‘He took up our infirmities and bore our diseases.'”
1 Peter 2:24 – “He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; ‘by his wounds you have been healed.'”
Matthew 4:24 – “News about him spread all over Syria, and people brought to him all who were ill with various diseases, those suffering severe pain, the demon-possessed, those having seizures, and the paralyzed; and he healed them.”
Revelation 21:4 – “‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”
Jeremiah 30:17 – “‘But I will restore you to health and heal your wounds,’ declares the LORD, ‘because you are called an outcast, Zion for whom no one cares.'”
Luke 10:34 – “He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him.”